I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
this just has baby written all over it
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
So many bounce houses so little time
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
