So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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