Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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