just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
It's never too late to be topless.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
