We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
