Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
