My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Randomize
