Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
