First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize