U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I'd cum for enchiladas.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
