all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
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