Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize