dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize