I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
