He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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