Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize