I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
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