You're completely useless in the revolution.
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Randomize
