whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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