Me. At least after what I've been through.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
