you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
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