No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Randomize