it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
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