Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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