God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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