This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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