Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
