i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
