btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
