dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
