But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
