ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
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