We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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