im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
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