Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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