Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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