You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize
