Got a toothbrush?
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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