Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
