y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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