I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
