getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Randomize
