Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
