just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
