Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
