Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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