how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Randomize