so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
A+ Viking dick
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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