It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Plan B is the new Plan A
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
