i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
So vagazzling was a success
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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