How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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