ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize